Was 19th century British poet, Lord Alfred Tennyson correct in saying, “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”? Or, is that just a faint attempt to console a tender heart after a tumultuous break-up?
Good news for romantics: scientists claim that true love does, in fact, exist. A study of brain scans showed that couples can maintain their early sparks of romance and excitement over 20 years.
According to John Harlow and Brendan Montague of the Times Online, scientists studied the brain scans of couples who had been together for 20 years. Studies revealed that “one in 10 of the mature couples exhibited the same chemical reactions when shown photographs of their loved ones as people commonly do in their early states of a relationship.”
Despite this scientific breakthrough, many hapless romantics struggle with the idea of finding true love often asking themselves, “How do I actually find true love if it exists?” If you are like me, then you have probably found yourself on the wrong end of a courtship that never blossomed. There were many times when I failed miserably at the dating game, wondering why feelings of love were never mutual.
What is true love? According to writer Adeyemi Adetosoye, “True love is the epitome of all your needs and desires in the other person, to a large extent. You can never meet another human being who perfectly epitomizes what you truly desire.”
It is far from a mystical revelation when I tell you the key to a joyful relationship and a “happily-ever-after” is finding “the one”. A lot of people believe that there may be just one unique individual for every person in the world. I however, disagree. Where ever one goes there is always the possibility of meeting one or more persons who uniquely match our tastes – philosophically, culturally, materially, emotionally, and physically.
With this said, why wait for the “perfect one”? Humans will always be humans – if that makes sense. We all have emotions, desires and needs – none being perfect. So how can we envelope our lives with a perfect person if such a person doesn’t exist. Ideology only exists in the study of philosophy. One can never find the exact flavor, shade, build, mannerism, etc. he/she is seeking. So, why wait around miserably for the “one” when you can find compromise and happiness in the someone who has actually fallen for you. These fictional characters we call, “ideal lovers” only exist is sappy movies and trashy love stories.
Compromise is the key to true love and those who perfect the ideals of compromise have perfected true love. So yes, true love does exist but your “ideal” mate may not.